I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
