I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize