i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
