Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
That accounts for only three of the penises
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
