wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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