You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
