so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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