just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Screwed.edu
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
