The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
