i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
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