Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
