she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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