i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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