she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
