Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
