My brain says no but my pants say off.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
