i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
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