I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
