Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize
