Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I forgot wine drunk hurts
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
