'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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