HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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