Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize
