It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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