If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Randomize
