This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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