I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
why is half of my head shaved?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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