remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Did you pee in the oven last night??
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
