what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
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