i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Randomize
