You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Randomize
