My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
