so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
