i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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