the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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