I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
