I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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