I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
