i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Randomize