that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize