whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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