David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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