I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Randomize
