okay pat passed out under dana's car
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Actions speak louder than pants.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
