I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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