i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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