That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
