your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Randomize
