Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
