I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
