I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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