Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize